unicorn by weebl

unicorn by weebl

Are you what happens when a narwhal makes sweet sweet love to a horse
Sexy sexy fish horse
Fly through the air
Pooping out rainbows how did you think that that's cute
You've given away the location of all my gold
Unicorn won't you let me
Touch your magical horn
Unicorn won't you let me
Touch your magical horn
Gather around me
Magical creatures magical woodland friends
Let me tell you tales of the unicorn
He's a bastard, the little bastard
I wanna punch him in his stupid horse face bastard
The little bastard
Telling all the folks where my gold is
He's a bastard
He's a bastard
I wanna punch in his stupid horse face bastard
The little bastard
Telling all the folks where my gold is
Unicorn won't you let me
Touch your magical horn
Unicorn won't you let me
Touch your magical horn

stephen fry by weebl

Stephen Fry by weebl Stephen Fry National treasure Looking out the window of his loft at night Stephen Fry Playing in the dark With the gadgets that he's bought that day Stephen Fry Logging onto Twitter now Letting all the folks know 'Bout the wordy book he enjoyed Stephen Fry Driving around in his London taxi Stephen Fry Driving around in his London taxi Picking up randoms 'Coz he's Stephen Stephen Fry Yeah he's Stephen Super Fly Yeah he's Stephen Stephen FryYeah he's Stephen Super Fly

telephone dog by weebl

telephone dog by weebl

Man: Hello?. . . Hello?. . . Hello?. . .

Dog: Hello yes, this is Dog.

Man: Hello is that the hospital? Can you put me through to my Mother, she's ill-in. Aw yes she's ill-in.

Dog: Hello yes this is Dog.

Man: Get off the phone Dog!

Dog: Hello yes, I am Dog. I am on the phone.

Man: Put the phone down!

Dog: I'm on the phone. I'm on the phone, Dog.

Man: Noo put it down!

Dog: No Dog. Who is calling Dog, on the phone?

Man: I'm not calling Dog i'm calling for the hospital, I want to speak to my Mother!

Dog: No not the hospital it's Dog!
Man: Aaah!

Poilicewoman: Police, can I help you?

Man: I'm trying to call the hospital to speak to my Mum who is ill-in and shit but every time that I do I get interupted by a Dog on the line.

Dog: Who's called?

Man: Ugh, it's you Dog isn't it?

Dog: Yes this is Dog. Hello?. . .

Dog: Hello, yes I am Dog. I'm on the phone. I'm on the phone. Dog. Hello, Dog. Who is calling Dog on the phone? Hello yes, this is Dog.

scotch egg by weebl

scotch egg by weebl

Scotch egg! It's the egg from Scotland.
It's a Scotch egg, encased in pork and bread crumbs.
Scotch egg, Scotch egg; what's that on your leg, is it a Scotch egg?
Scotch egg, it's a Scotch egg...

Scotch egg... was actually invented in London in 1851 by a shop called Fortnum & Mason's.
Contrary to popular belief, it's a non-Scotch dish and that's a relief, because a Scotch egg is not a Scotch egg.

Australia by weebl

Australia by weebl

What is the number 1 reason,
For a day off work,
In Australia?

Well let me tell you...

POSSUM ATTACK!
POSSUM ATTACK!

POSSUM ATTACK!
POSSUM ATTACK!


POSSUM ATTACK!
POSSUM ATTACK!

POSSUM ATTACK!
POSSUM ATTACK!

It's a possum attack

giraffe by weebl

giraffe by weebl

There was a giraffe in my loft,
I didn't invite it,
It was stomping round for days,
And kept me up all night.

Giraffe in my loft,
A giraffe in my loft.

I kicked him out he seemed OK,
The roof space is quite low anyway,
Within an hour he'd sunk back in,
His elephant friends had come with him.

Giraffe in my loft,
Wit that long neck hes stuffed,
wears my chimney for a scarf,
Oh giraffe you're havin' a laugh!


repeats

blimp by weebl

blimp by weebl

 

 

Everybody needs to get a blimp
'Coz blimps are pretty pimp
You can fill them up with air
But that won't get you anywhere

Advertise upon the side
Take your girlfriend for a ride
Just fill up the balloon
With the very best gas in toon

Helium!

You need helium to fill that bitch up
It's the 2nd symbol on the periodic table
Oxygen and nitrogen are way behind it
As far as gases go they're both pretty stupid

Helium!

Helium!

Helium!

Don't breathe it in though